The Moronica Awards*
Post 1,036
WARNING! Contains Snark
Sensitive readers are advised to get over it.
The Moronica Awards are given to those who behave with the distinction of being obviously mentally unfit and who offer themselves without hesitation to display their true limitations publicly. The Awards are heavily weighted toward those who have made the greatest public impact to dumb down and compromise our world.
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First, a context setter from Steve Schmidt in his post of December 13, 2023:
“Where the original America First extremists were Hitler’s useful idiots, these [MAGA] America First-ers are those of Vladimir Putin. Each group disdains the US constitution and is easily manipulated by the siren song of their leader’s madness and lies. Their patriotism is hollow and cancerous. They are the scourge of Americanism because they disdain it and will destabilize the world until it starts burning again. America First was a threat in the 1930s, and it is a threat today.”
Thus, the first 2024 Moronica Award goes to the MAGA America First-ers. These are Trump’s impassioned, fawning followers, eager to seig heil their leader, to renounce their own principles and those of our country, to vent their fears and anger and to be useful idiots for people who hate America (see the Quote of the Week below). While these words might not register within them due to their mental limitations, we offer congratulations to all! You have earned this distinction moronically.
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The recipients of the second Moronica Award have worked tirelessly to perfect their voluntary ignorance and are most obviously deserving of recognition. The second 2024 Moronica Award goes to Republicans in Congress.
These brain damaged people practice their craft every day, cleverly finding new ways to do and say moronic things. Their major current project is to wail about the immigration situation at our southern border, decry what they call the President’s open borders policy, demand with eyes a-googling that our laws be improved and then declare that they will refuse every solution offered for improvement, even from bi-partisan coalitions. In other words, they demand change and steadfastly refuse all change. It’s moronic.
These Republican morons in Congress are now attempting to impeach Secretary of Homeland Security Alejandro Mayorkas. They have no evidence of high crimes and misdemeanors. so they are impeaching him for the complete failure of Congress to enact laws sufficient to the task of protecting our borders. Note that they wrote their articles of impeachment before holding hearings.
These actions and more are truly and deeply moronic, even as they are only the most current demonstrations of Republican moronica.
Congratulations are offered to Congressional Republicans, both for their moronic behavior and for the cowardice of those who know better but refuse to take a stand. Moronically done, one and all!
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These awards would be incomplete without recognition of all the enablers of the Orange Circus Master. So, the third 2024 Moronica Award goes to Donald Trump, Jr., Eric Trump, Ivanka Trump, Jared Kushner, Steve Bannon, Paul Manafort, Roger Stone, Mark Meadows, Lindsay Graham, Mitch McConnell, Mike Johnson, Ron Johnson, Gini Thomas. Stephen Miller, Jeffrey Clark and the rest of the spineless suck-ups.
A dishonorable mention goes to all the ancestors of Republican cruelty, like Paul Weyrich, Richard Nixon, Christian provocateurs like Pat Robertson, Jerry Falwell and head Jesus quoting sneak Ralph Reed, plus all the progenitors of modern Republican absolutistism, like Barry Goldwater, George Wallace, Newt Gingrich and the slinkiest of all, Ronald Reagan.
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The Grand Prize Gold Star 2004 Moronica Award goes to Donald Trump for his outrageous and bafflingly stupid claim of immunity from prosecution for all his criminal behavior while President. On Tuesday a three-judge panel of the U.S. Court of Appeals for the District of Columbia Circuit handed Trump a devastating defeat for him in his federal elections interference case. It is a magnificent victory for justice and the rule of law.
The unanimous decision (download the text of the court’s decision here) was quite aggressive in it’s smack down of Trump’s “I’m above the law” claims and we can only hope that his lawyers get an appropriate smack down from the American Bar Association for their absurd and insulting claims. Meanwhile, we can cheer that the big bully got punched in the nose once again.
He will appeal to the Supreme Court, but don’t be surprised if they refuse to review the case. Trump’s argument really is that stupid.
To all Moronica Award recipients, sadly, your 2024 Moronica Awards are well-earned.
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The Cure for Moronica
There is good news and there is bad news.
Yoda
The bad news is that there is no cure for moronica. It is a persistent, progressive disease for which there is no penicillin. There have been reports of a few cases of spontaneous remission, but these are only anecdotal. No scientific study has been possible because nearly all carriers of this disease cling to their extremist views as though they are lifelines in a violent sea.
While there is no known cure for moronica, there is still good news: We can overpower it.
I recently consulted with Master Yoda about this. He explained the path to me and directed that I share his wisdom with you.
“A great and terrible disturbance there is in The Force. Happened this has many times before and evil is once again coming to destroy the Republic and enslave the people.
“If free people you are to remain, The Way of The Vote you must learn. A luminous path it is to what is right and what is good. To refuse The Vote is a path to the dark side.
“Not enough is it for you to do this noble task. Influence others to Vote, you must. You will do this with the The Force that is within you. Feel it connecting you to others and between you and the stacks of prepared ballots awaiting voters. Then guide others, you must, and follow you to the polls they will on the wave of The Force. Then will you feel the crushing of the disturbance in The Force, the moronica will be defeated and triumphant will be democracy.
“Go now. Much work there is to do. If your job you do well, The Vote will be with you, always.”
The final battle will be on November 5. Meanwhile, there is much preparation for us to do, including donating to those who are on the proper path of truth, justice and the American way, plus supporting and promoting the candidates who are the true defenders of our republic. We are the Army Of Democracy!
May The Vote be with us!
Quote of the Week
From Steve Schmidt’s post of February 5,
Tucker Carlson is an internet-era Father Coughlin, a domestic enemy of the US Constitution, a friend of tyrants, and a disloyal American.
It just tickles my confirmation bias to read that. Yes, really.
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* From Wikipedia:
Moron is a term once used in psychology and psychiatry to denote mild intellectual disability.[1] The term was closely tied with the American eugenics movement.[2] Once the term became popularized, it fell out of use by the psychological community, as it was used more commonly as an insult than as a psychological term. It is similar to imbecile and idiot.[3]
In using the word “moron” in this post, no disparagement is intended toward most persons suffering this mental limitation. The disparagement is solely and intentionally focused on those persons specifically named herein.
- Today is a good day to be the light
- _____________________________
- Our governance and electoral corruption and dysfunction and our ongoing mass murders are all of a piece, all the same problem with the same solution:
- Fire the bastards!
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Copyright 2024 by Jack Altschuler
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